What constitutes marriage according to the Bible? When are two people married in the eyes of God? At what time does God look at two and say, ‘man and wife’?
Is a marriage constituted by an agreement, betrothal, a certificate, wedding party, etc? What does the Bible say?
What constitutes marriage according to the Bible
Two people become man and wife in the eyes of God when they become one flesh. See how two become one flesh.
It is only in sex two people join or unify themselves to be one flesh thus becoming man and wife in the eyes of God.
Bible examples when two people are married in the eyes of God
Adam and Eve
After Adam became one flesh with the woman, it is when God called them a man and wife. It is when they were married in the eyes of God.
Gen 2: 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and they shall become one flesh.
Gen 2: 25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife and they were not ashamed.
See that Gen 2: 24 comes before verse 25 and that is not a mistake.
The joining (unification) takes place in sex resulting to two becoming one flesh. See how two become one flesh. And after unifying themselves, when Adam and the woman were both naked, God looked at them and said, ’man and his wife’.
See that the first instance we find God calling two people a man and wife in the Bible is in Gen 2:25 when both are naked after becoming one flesh (sex).
If you define or interpret the Bible without using the first mention principle, you will misinterpret and misunderstand it. See the first mention principle.
The Bible is self explanatory and in the first mention of a concept, idea, word, etc it explains itself and any other mentions just expound not contradict.
Look keenly at Gen 2: 25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife and they were not ashamed.
When a man haves sex with his wife and both are naked, they are not ashamed. But when a person is committing adultery or fornication and they are both naked, they are ashamed. Many people conscience has been corrupt thus they are not ashamed of their sins.
The first time you sin you’re ashamed but when you continue sinning more and more, sin takes control and you become a slave of sin thus you justify and see nothing wrong with sin. See how sin controls a person.
In accordance to the FIRST MENTION PRINCIPLE, since ‘man and his wife’ in the Bible is first mentioned after Adam became one flesh with Eve, the entire Bible follows the same script (when two people are married in the eyes of God).
Isaac and Rebecca
It is until Isaac became one flesh with Rebecca when they became man and wife.
Gen 24:67 Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent, and he took Rebecca and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death.
In taking Rebecca, Isaac became one flesh with her thus she became his wife.
Jacob and his wives
In when you marry the wrong person, you have seen the story of Jacob and his two wives; Rachel and Leah.
It was until Jacob had sex with each one of these sisters they became his wives.
Gen 29: 22-23 And Laban gathered together all men of the place and made a feast. Now it came to pass in the evening that he took Leah his daughter and brought her to Jacob and he went in to her.
When Jacob went in to Leah, he had sex with her, became one flesh with her thus Leah became his wife. Reason Jacob for his love of God did not divorce her because he had made her his wife in the eyes of God and divorce is sin.
See what the Bible teaches on divorce (next)
Laws of Moses (Mosaic Law)
In the Mosaic Law when two people, not committing adultery, had sex it was a must for them to marry because in the eyes of God they became one flesh; man and wife.
Exodus 22: 16 if a man entices a virgin who is not betrothed and lies with her, he shall surely pay the bride-price for her to be his wife.
Deut 22:28 if a man finds a young woman who is a virgin, who is not betrothed and seizes her and lies with her, and they are found out. Then the man who lay with her shall give to the young woman’s father fifty shekels of silver and she shall be his wife because he has humbled her; he shall not be permitted to divorce her al his days.
Why? Because the man and the virgin woman committed neither fornication nor adultery but joined themselves to be one flesh thus they are man and wife in the eyes of God. Therefore the man should pay dowry as customs dictate.
The first person you had sex with is your husband or wife in the eyes of God because you made yourself one flesh with him/her. Any other person you had/have sex with after that first person is committing adultery (becoming one flesh with many people).
Reason if you divorce a person and marry another person while your previous husband/wife is alive, whether you gave him/her a certificate of divorce, you are committing adultery and adultery is sin.
Mk 10:11 ‘whosoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery’.
As I have said in how two become one flesh, you become one flesh with every person you have sex with thus every man or woman you have or had sex with became your husband or wife.
And since you become one flesh with many people, all are your husband’s/wives in the eyes of God, apart from adultery, you have married many people in the eyes of God and polygamy is a sin. See polygamy is sin (next)
Customary (traditional) marriages
In many customary marriages and even in the Jewish customary marriage which the Bible is written in accordance, children were betrothed when they were young.
Thus a child grew knowing his/her husband or wife to be but they were not allowed to have sex until their wedding day. It is in their wedding day when they had sex for the first time thus becoming one flesh; a man and a wife.
Betrothal or agreeing to marry does not make you a man and a wife until you become one flesh.
Reason Joseph wanted to leave Mary secretly even without giving her a certificate of divorce as dictated by Mosaic Law and that was not a sin to Joseph since he had not yet made himself one flesh (man and wife) with Mary and Mary seemed to have had sex with another person not Joseph.
When you agree or get betrothed, you have made a promise (a vow) thus you have to keep the promise as long as the other person has not become one flesh (have sex) with another person or else you will have sinned.
Are we waiting until the wedding day to have our first sex according to customs?
To many people the answer is No! Customary marriages have died in today’s world and agreeing to marry and waiting until the wedding day to have our first sex has also died.
According to the Bible, the first person you have/had sex with is your husband or wife because you became one flesh with him/her and God looked at the naked both of you after sex and said, ’man and wife’.
Any other person you had/have sex with after that first partner, you committed or you’re committing adultery.
This is the Biblical gospel not worldly knowledge and wisdom.