How do you find a husband or wife the God’s way? Does the Bible teach this? Yes!
Every person at a certain time in life needs his/her perfect partner created specifically for him/her. How to find your specifically created partner is the issue and many people go astray in this stage of life.
How to find a husband or wife the God’s way
Finding a husband or wife the God’s way needs bible understanding and wisdom. The big question is:-
- Should a Christian search for a husband or wife? and
- How is one supposed to do it in a biblical Godly way?
Worldly way of finding a husband or wife
Because every person needs a partner at some point in life, the world has provided its ways of finding a husband or wife. The world, Satan, is a snare to Christians and many have fallen to its deception.
The world tells you, ‘go and search for a husband or wife‘. It teaches and gives you everything you need but it neither promises nor guarantees a perfect heavenly partner.
Churches and many Christians have accepted and fallen to world’s knowledge and wisdom. Many churches are preaching and teaching how to find a husband or wife the worldly way.
Satan main agenda is to take Jesus Christ away from this world. He has taken away the power of the creator in finding a husband or wife, and funny that Christians even the so called ‘men of God’ have fallen to his snare and they cannot see this.
Should a Christian search for a husband or wife
To answer this question correctly, lets us go back to creation for answers.
God created first Adam and He put him in the Garden of Eden.
And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul. And the LORD God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed (Gen 2:7-8).
Adam was all alone in the Garden of Eden with only animals and plants, and he didn’t feel lonely. But God knew that at a certain time, Adam will feel lonely and start looking for a helper or companion; he will need a partner.
Therefore, God saw that it was not good for Adam to be alone.
Gen 2:18: And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
God took the step to make Adam a helper. He did not go directly to give Adam his helper because Adam was comfortable and satisfied in his state of loneliness. Therefore, God had to make Adam feel lonely, feel the need.
He gave Adam a task to perform.
God created all animals and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them.
Gen 2:19: And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.
NB: Realize that verse 18 comes before verse 19 and this is not a mistake.
Gen 2:20: And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.
The animals were in pairs and Adam gave them all names e.g. Mr. and Mrs. giraffe, Mr. and Mrs. lion, Mr. and Mrs. warthog, Mr. and Mrs. elephant e.t.c. But in the last line of verse 20 it is said, ‘but for Adam there was not found a help meet for him’.
At that point Adam felt his loneliness and in need of a partner. After Adam realized his loneliness, God did not give him a chance to look for a companion.
Immediately the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof. And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man (Gen 2:21-22).
It is God who created and brought a woman to man (Adam) not Adam searching or looking for his wife. God did not tell Adam to go look for a partner.
And when God brought the woman to Adam, this is what Adam said, ‘This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man (Gen 2:23)’.
Just from the first look at the woman, Adam realized that she was his perfect partner. Why? Because Adam saw bone of his bones, flesh of his flesh. Reason he named her woman because she was taken out of him.
Gen 2:24-25: Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
Lessons learned from God creating Adam a partner
From Genesis chapter 2 seen above, we learn the following important lessons.
1. When you were created, and put in the Garden of Eden (the world), you did not feel lonely in need of a husband or wife.
Being young, you had no need of a opposite sex partner and you did not even know anything about the opposite sex but God knew there is a time you will need a partner of the opposite sex. Like Adam, you lived in the Garden of Eden, the world, comfortable satisfied and feeling complete; no loneliness.
2. Even in your creation, God knew it is not good for you to be alone and He is in the process of making you realize your loneliness.
Yes! God knew when creating you that a time will come when you will feel lonely and need a partner. Like Adam, He gives you a task and in the process you realize your loneliness. Reason verse 18 of Genesis 2 comes before verse 19 and this is not a mistake.
3. We do not feel lonely or realize we need a husband or wife until God gives us the need.
Yes! It is until God intervenes and makes you feel lonely when you realize that you need a helper. It is until God triggers your hormones in the body, or like Adam He gives you a task to perform, for you to realize you need a partner of the opposite sex. A time comes for every person when s/he realizes s/he needs a husband or wife.
4. At the right time, God does something that makes you realize you are alone in need of a partner.
He gave Adam the task of naming animals and to you and me, He also gives us a task to perform to realize our loneliness. It may be going to a wedding party, a social event, walking seeing couples happy together etc or He may trigger your body hormones, etc.
5. After realizing you are lonely in need of a partner, God creates one for you by making you sleep and takes your rib.
When you feel lonely, needing a husband or wife, do not go to search but instead sleep. Many people don’t obey God in this point and God gives them out to their stupidity. Going out to search or find your helper is un-Godly, un-Biblical.
God does not force Himself to man, therefore to sleep or not to is your decision but God will tell you ‘sleep‘. The time you are asleep like Adam, it is the time when God creates your exact match.
Sleeping means that you do not go to search or act in anyway but letting your mind (soul) and body sleep on this issue; living like you do not feel lonely, like you do not care about that.
By sleeping, you allow God do His creation which He began and He will accomplish by giving you your exact heavenly made husband or wife at the right time and place.
6. God does not give His own a chance or allow them to search for their husband or wife.
His own are those who truly obey Him but realize He does not force Himself to you; God always lets man choose his/her way. After Adam realized that he needed a helper, God did not tell Adam ‘search, go find’.
If Adam was allowed to find, what could he come out with as a helper, a partner, a companion? An ape, a monkey, a gorilla, a cow, a goat; straight an animal.
When you go out to search for a helper, a companion, a partner, husband or wife, without allowing God to create one for you, you come out with an animal.
Many people even Christians have disobeyed God reason marriages are not marriages because we have gone out to search, came out with an animal and married an animal.
7. It is God who brings the perfect match He has created to you.
You just have to sleep and your Godly Heavenly created perfect husband or wife will be brought to you at the right time and place. Go on with your life as though there is nothing you need, like you do not feel the need.
Focus on God and He will bring the perfect partner He has created for you at the right time and when you will see her/him at the first time, like Adam you will say, ‘This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man (Gen 2:23)’.
Yes! The first time God presents your helper to you, you will see him/her and surely know and say, ‘that is she or he’. S/he is my bone of bones and flesh of my flesh’. My husband or my wife’.
People who have stuck with God and obeyed Him, they have found their dream partners. Ask any one of them if they realized the first time they saw each other if s/he was the one. The answer is Yes!
Wait for God, you can wait!
Therefore fellow Christians and every person who will come across this article, learn to obey God. Sleep and wait for God to create and bring your perfect partner at the right time and place. He will definitely do it at the right time.
Going out to search or find a husband or wife is going against God plan of creation; creating you.
For those who went out as the world teaches, searched and married see when you marry the wrong person
God bless you